This Manga Offers an Incredibly Realistic Look at VTubing With Social Anxiety

Earlier this year, my best friend and I started watching VTuber Legend: How I Went Viral After Forgetting to Turn Off My Stream in VRChat. It’s a lovely yuri take on VTubing, a show where a growing VTuber learns how to let her hair down and become more degen on stream after revealing her infatuation with other female streamers. No doubt, a lot of VTubers are gay little gremlins, simping over their female colleagues on and off stream (happy Pride Month).

But as a VTuber myself? VTuber Legend is a glorified view of VTubing. The drama is minimal, the agency is too accommodating, and everyone looks like their VTuber models off-stream. As much as I love its yuri elements, VTuber Legend doesn’t represent VTubing in its entirety. Including the inner demons some VTubers struggle with, like social anxiety.

My oshi can’t Talk to strangers?!

My Favorite VTuber Is Scary IRL, on the other hand, does a fantastic job of showing a specific mental health struggle commonly seen in VTubing. Created by Riyo Yorima, the series follows a shy delivery boy running orders for a company called “Delivery Eats.” One of his customers is a very tall woman with piercings and chokers, a woman so “imposing” that he’s literally freaked out by her. The last thing he wants is to deliver meals to her.

Meanwhile, our socially anxious delivery boy is infatuated with a kind-hearted VTuber named Hanae Fuwari, his self-proclaimed oshi (or favorite VTuber and idol). Like him, Fuwari also struggles with shyness IRL and vows to tackle her problem head-on. So, when our protagonist returns to the tall woman’s apartment to deliver another order, she awkwardly thanks him for his work — and he immediately recognizes her voice. At that exact moment, we switch to Fuwari’s viewpoint, and we realize it’s true: Our delivery boy’s oshi is, in fact, the “scary” woman he delivers food for. A scary woman who is deeply socially anxious.

“That was so nerve wracking!!” Fuwari says to herself, with the label “shut-in” pointing right at her. “When was the last time I’d spoken to someone…?!”

From there, the series follows Fuwari and her delivery boy fan as he helps her overcome her intense social anxiety, supporting her as she slowly learns how to interact with others.

VTubers and their fans both struggle with social anxiety

It’s easy to see why My Favorite VTuber Is Scary IRL is popular with many VTuber fans. A story about a viewer meeting his oshi and helping her overcome a serious life issue? It’s a dream come true for many. Simply learning one’s oshi struggles with social anxiety can increase the bond between a viewer and a VTuber, too. Initial research suggests VTuber fans are more likely to struggle with social anxiety, fueling an infatuation with one’s oshi.

“Compared to usual livestream viewers, VTuber watchers are more prone to social phobia in real life and show a stronger dependence on the host,” a study of Chinese Gen Z VTuber viewers on YouTube concluded. “The social drivers of entertainment, information seeking, and sense of community are weaker, indicating that social communication and social anxiety are the main social motivations of VTuber viewers.”

Much can be said about the parasocial relationship between a VTuber and their fans. I’m personally inclined to defend healthy, playful parasociality as long as the boundaries are clear between fantasy and reality. But when it comes to My Favorite Vtuber Is Scary IRL, it’s not the VTuber-fan relationship that interests me. It’s Fuwari herself — or, technically, the woman behind Fuwari.

You see, many female VTubers struggle with social anxiety in some shape or form. This can range from minor issues with answering the phone to serious problems leaving the house. Agoraphobia is another common issue that I’ve seen many female VTubers discuss, too. From their journey overcoming it to agoraphobic tendencies increasing in their life.

VTubing didn’t make us mentally ill. Rather, many of us found the “real world” wasn’t very accepting, accommodating, or just plain fair. Some of us were even bullied in childhood and only found belonging online. For us, VTubing isn’t a maladaptive behavior, but an adaptive one. Streaming gives us a social outlet in a world where it’s easy to feel isolated to video games, anime, and social media. And VTubing allows us to connect with an audience that shares our struggles with social anxiety and social isolation.

After all, so many of us would otherwise be described as NEETs: Women who are not in education, employment, or training. Just nerdy women struggling to pay rent. That was the case for me until I landed this gig at Waypoint. It’s nice to meet other people living the NEET life. Who make you feel sane for struggling to fit in with normies during your 20s and 30s.

‘My Favorite VTuber is Scary IRL’ is more than just fiction

Now, as a relatively small VTuber, would I ever ask one of my fans to help me engage in makeshift exposure therapy? Uh, no. I used to pay a therapist for weekly sessions to overcome my OCD; you really do need professional help if you want to get better. And that’s where My Favorite VTuber Is Scary IRL is ultimately a fantasy.

But fantasy or not, it’s still one I relate to very much. I became a bit more socially isolated in 2023 and 2024, something that worsened after I left my full-time job in February 2024. My mental health tanked due to workplace stress, to the point where I couldn’t handle seeing people regularly IRL. So my main social outlet became VTubing. Bit by bit, the NEET life became much more familiar to me as I immersed myself in queer indie VTubing culture, as I traded in slacks for sweatpants and dress shirts for hoodies.

Even today, my social life is mostly online. Although I’ve been trying to better myself since August 2024, when I hit my low point: I couldn’t make use of my Anime NYC press badge because I was too socially anxious to go out. Medication — and actively challenging myself with all those exposure therapy skills — have helped me recover a little bit. But it’s still taking time.

I have a lot of love for Fuwari for this exact reason. She might be a bit taller, she might dress more fashionably than I, and she’s certainly a more popular VTuber. But she’s not so different from me. We both have fan bases who feel inspired by us and our content. We both struggle with social anxiety despite our capacity to perform and entertain online. And we both are trying to better ourselves day by day, making sure we don’t rot inside our homes. I’m sure this is a story many VTubers relate to, from the smallest to the biggest. And I hope it inspires them to give My Favorite VTuber Is Scary IRL a read.

You can read the manga now on Manga UP!